Bone Deep Boredom
by anxiousgeek
Summary: SG1Atlantis crossover, John SheppardVala Mal Doran


_I lost my head when I found my heart,  
but now with neither I've fallen all apart,_

He hadn't seen her coming, hadn't seen this coming.

She'd appeared next to him out of nowhere and proceeded to loop her arm with his, pulling him close to her. Very little made him jump, but from what he'd heard, Vala had led the kind of life that had made her very, very good at sneaking up on people.

She was bored, he could tell, not by the hyperactive bounce in her step, or the rapid conversation, but there was a look in her eyes that he recognised. A bone deep boredom with life that wasn't filled by anything, that could distracted by danger and sex, and all the bad things life had to offer. Which was why he had ended up in the Air Force. He'd done too much, too young.

He listened to her babble while they walked, eventually ending up on one of the balconies at the far end of the cityand away from the control tower. When she let go of him finally, he bent over the side and looked down at the waves, bending his body over as far as he could, standing on his very tip-toes.

"What are you doing?" Vala asked, raising her voice over the crash of the angry waves.

"I think about jumping." He told her, shouting, the wind pushing his hair all to one side. Vala came to stand next to him and leant over herself to look down.

For a long moment she didn't say anything and he was worried he'd gotten her all wrong.

They'd sat in the meeting letting everything gloss over them, both recognising the mask the other wore of false concentration and attention. Except she didn't have the patience to last it out like he did, and after a while, the boredom got the better of her, and she chattered a bit, stopped pretending she was listening. Flirted with him.

She needed distracting again, as if a new galaxy and the Ori weren't enough for her.

"To see what would happen I assume," she said, "you don't strike me as the suicidal type."

"Nah, but it'd be one hell of a rush."

"Better than the gate?"

"Different."

"Different." She repeated the word, nodding in understanding. She stood up straight then and pulled John up, reaching out to ruffle his hair up straight.

"You're an interesting person Colonel Sheppard," Vala smiled, "not nearly as boring as most of the Air Force officers I've met."

"But I'm still boring?" She grinned at his raised eyebrow, and ruffled hair, the disbelief stretching his face was cute.

"Just a little, I mean, I latch myself onto you, we go for a nice walk and you bring me here. And while the view is lovely, you've no intention of jumping,"

"No." He put in.

"So there's not exactly a lot to do on this bal..." before she could finish her sentence, John's hands were in her hair and his lips on her. He turned her around and pushed her up again the balcony edge, her hands drifting down his back as they kissed.

"That," Vala said, tasking a deep breath when they broke apart, "is more like it."

"Well I'm so glad you approve." She laughed and kissed him, pulling him closer to grind her hips into his. He was panting by time she was done with him, her hand down the back of his pants.

"Your place or mine?" he asked, between breaths. Her hair was everywhere, a result of the sea wind and his hands, and she looked like she had been ravished already, with her swollen lips, when they had only really just gotten started.

"I believe on earth that's a cliché. In fact it is in most of the galaxy."

"Just answer the question will ya."

"I'd much rather do it out here." She ginned and he thought it over, thought about being caught. By Weir, or Mitchell, or Jackson. Or McKay.

"Why the hell not," He said in a huff of breath before she kissed him again.

He woke up in the middle of the night to the soft lights of Atlantian lamps and a curtain of dark glossy hair. He watched for a minute as Vala brushed her hair, realising he was starting to have a thing for brunettes. Though Vala's hair really was something else he realised, as he recalled the way it had framed her pale skin as they'd had sex on the balcony and in this bed. She was sitting cross-legged now, wearing a t-shirt, and he moved to lean on one elbow and watch her.

"You're beautiful." He told her. She smiled.

"You're not so bad yourself Colonel," She answered, eyes running over his bare chest, pausing mid-motion, her brush in the middle of her hair.

"I work out."

"I much prefer to watch." She grinned and they were silent, the moment a little awkward until she began to brush her hair again, throwing it to the other side. John could tell it didn't need brushing though, it was perfect, it was just something to do while she couldn't sleep.

No wonder she got into so much trouble. John was often in the gym at this hour, or working out somewhere. Elizabeth had suggested reading, but, it didn't help. Nothing helped.

"Have you tried reading?"

"For what?"

"Because you can't sleep at night," She stopped brushing her hair again; staring at him "I can't either."

"Sleep is awfully boring. All that time wasted." She was trying to by-pass the topic but John could tell there were times she wished she could just go to sleep. His whole marriage had been liked that.

"Tell me about it," He said softly and she smiled, leaning over to kiss him as softly as he had spoken. "We're very alike."

"You and I, Colonel, are nothing alike," She insisted, putting her brush down on the cabinet.

"Why don't you call me John?" he asked. "You haven't since we met."

"I can't." She confessed, dipping her head down, hair falling around her face, hiding it from view.

"Why not?"

"I don't want to talk about it. He was a life time ago. A galaxy or two away."

"I want to know." He reached out and lifted her head up.

"Why?"

"Because you're just like me, you're bored, you're just waiting for the next adventure, the next heart to break, the next suicide mission and I've never met anyone like me before."

Vala hadn't been expecting this from a one night stand, hadn't been expecting anything so deep from handsome Colonel with cute hair and a cute ass. She wasn't ready for this and wasn't sure she could deal with it.

"John," She tested the name on her tongue.

"You're bored with life."

"I was."

"You still are. Else you wouldn't be in bed with me." He sat up and pulled her to him, kissing her. "you'd have fucked me on the balcony and gone back to Jackson."

"I don't know what you want from me." She was kissing him, hovering over him, his hands running up the t-shirt.

John didn't have an answer to that, he'd never really come across anyone who really understood him. Had the potential to understand him at least, but he felt it in Vala, felt it running through her and into him when their bodies were connected and suddenly it was the most important thing in the galaxy. She was the most important person in the galaxy.

He didn't answer her, instead pulling her t-shirt off and throwing it aside. Her hair rested on her bare shoulders. It would be easier if she weren't so beautiful, he decided, kissing her again.

"Is that why you came here? Because you're bored?" She asked, when his lips moved to her neck.

"Pretty much," he said. "I tossed a coin." Vala laughed and looked down at him as he worked his way down her body.

"Maybe we are alike."

She was gone when he woke up, the guest quarters packed up and deserted of her presence. SG-1 were going back to Earth today. He didn't try to hide the fact he'd spent the night with Vala. He didn't brag, but he left her quarters in yesterday's clothes, instead of finding a way to sneak unseen back to his quarters.

In a fresh uniform he came down to the control tower to find the SG-1 coming together, drifting towards one another like they were magnetised, drawn to one another. They stood in a little circle and he waited until Vala became bored with the conversation or the wait and wandered away from her team a little, before approaching her.

"Leaving without saying goodbye?" He said quietly, taking her arm and pulling her to one side.

"I didn't think you were the long goodbye type of guy," She said, smiling.

"No, but I thought we..." he paused,

"Thought we had something?" She finished the sentence for him and he realised she'd been here before, had this conversation before. Of course she had, he thought, he'd had this conversation before. Spurned women, left without saying goodbye, promised to call but had never taken a girls number, broken hearts.

He'd never been on this side of the conversation before though.

"I thought we at least had a connection."

"Perhaps," She said. "You're right, we're very alike, but for people like us..." she paused to try and find the right words, to try and find the right volume while SG-1 stood close by, and Weir hovered closely too, "we'd be no good together Colonel, we're heart breakers, we don't fall in love."

He didn't have an answer to that, because he'd never fallen in love before, he couldn't be sure what he was feeling right now, except that right now, this hurt. He stepped away from her, and forced out a smile.

"It'll happen." He told her, louder than he would've like but she had already walked back to join the others, join their circle. "It'll happen."

She looked at him, one last look, and turned her attentions back to SG-1.

"_with this voice and chord I'll tell you from the start,  
she never wanted me, she never wanted me."_

Jack Penãte – Second, Minute Or Hour


End file.
